I'll be blogged...again

Deep and meaningful I am not

I've been feeling like I should apologise for not being deep and meaningful on this blog. I remember back to my first blog all those years ago... back when I was just a completely anonymous blip on the internet. Oh the rants and the raves about my theological hobby horses and the big questions of life...

Now I just can't be bothered.

It feels like so much of my current context is taken up with the deep and meaningful of life (not that I feel that I am processing much of it!) that I just don't have the energy to do it on here as well - hence the incredibly superificial nature of my posts in recent weeks and months.

Life seems to be passing me by in a bit of a fog at the moment. I'm trying hard to think about things but they just seem to allude me. I'm not quite sure I remember what life was like B.C. (Before College that is) and I'm not quite sure I know what life is going to be like A.G. (After Graduation of course). People keep asking me "So what's new Dani?". And my reply, in all sincerity, is "Absolutely Nothing". Its all a bit frightening really... (Ed. and upon a re-reading of this post it's all a bit random also!)

But before this does actually become far too deep and meaningful to have been written by someone who is simply no longer deep and meaningful, let me lighten the tone a little with some pics my sister emailed to me earlier today. Hope they make you laugh.

Good for a laugh

1. go to www.google.co.uk
2. click on maps
3. click on "get directions"
4. enter in the 2 boxes - from "new york" to "london, england"
5. scroll down in the directions to number 24
6. laugh

Thanks to Roj for sharing!

Synopsis of my day

Location & Time: 11.15am - Outside church on North Shore

Uh Oh. Car won't start. Battery dead. Call NRMA. How long a wait? Up to an hour? How much does battery cost? How much do I have in bank? Are those two figures compatible? Oh Dear. Mother's Day Lunch. Going to be late. Call Mum.

Time Lapse: 50 minutes
NRMA arrives. Apparently battery not dead. Yay! Uh Oh. Wiring electrical problem? You can't fix it? It has to be towed? How long a wait? Up to another hour? Call Mum again. Call sister to arrange her to pick up grandmother's present. Mum calls me. Mum calls me again.

Time Lapse: 75 minutes
Tow Truck Arrives. Car attached to pulley and loaded onto back. Clamber up into cab of tow truck. Long way up. Long drive from Naremburn to Eastern Suburbs (where auto electrician located). Awkward conversation with driver the whole way. Car deposited in yard of auto electrician. Family arrives to pick me up. Wish Mum happy mother's day. Car key suddenly won't lock car. Why not?! Father accidentally breaks internal locking mechanism. Father repairs internal locking mechanism. Car key still won't lock car. Sister and mother return home to pick up spare key.

Time Lapse: 20 minutes
Sister and mother return with spare key. Package both keys in envelope. Try to slip envelope with keys under closed door of auto-electrician. Keys get jammed under door. Can't remove. Tears of frustration threaten to overwhelm. Have to walk away and take a number of deep breaths. Sister with long acrylic nails manages to pry keys out from under door (without setting off shop alarm). Mother discovers small flap in door around the corner of building. Presumably for situations such as this. Wish we had looked for that before. Slip keys in through flap. Finally head off to Mother's Day Lunch. We are now 1.5 hours late for it.

Total Time Taken to this point: Almost 4 hours
Remember that neglected to have any breakfast and have had no opportunity for lunch yet. Stay at Mother's Day Lunch for 40 minutes. Have to leave prior to any food being served. Return back to church on North Shore (in Dad's car) for evening service. Look after 8 kids under age of 5 for hour and half.

Time Lapse: 90 minutes
Return back to Mother's Day Lunch/Dinner (back in eastern suburbs). After half an hour leave with sister, mother and father (in Dad's car). Drive back to North Shore to drop my sister at her home. Drive from North Shore to Newtown where I disembark. Mother assumes driver's seat and drives herself and Dad home to Eastern Suburbs.

Enter MAC at 8.45pm. Start work on Congregational Ministry assignment due tomorrow morning at 10am.

Travel Summary for day: Newtown --> North Shore --> Eastern Suburbs --> North Shore --> Eastern Suburbs --> North Shore --> Newtown

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So what did we learn today kiddies?

Praying that God would teach you patience and humility is a very dangerous thing.

I couldn't have heard that right...

I was on my way back from Equip (which was great by the way!) and stopped in at a small cafe in the middle of the city to grab some lunch. The guy who served me (in his late 30s maybe) was fairly familiar in use of terms of endearment. For example, "How are you today sweetheart?" and "What can I get for you today darling?". Whilst I cringe a little at that type of familarity from perfect strangers, I do tend to just ignore it and it doesn't both me overly much.

But I was rendered completely speechless a little while later when, as he delivered my sandwich, he casually said, "Here you go love muffin".

WHAT? I couldn't have heard that correctly could I?! Surely no one calls a perfect stranger 'love muffin'. In fact should I ever be married (as remote as that possibility may seem!), I would be perfectly content if the words 'love muffin' never crossed by husbands lips either.

It's just not going to make me buy (or like) beer

So I really liked the Big Ad. I was fairly bemused at the catapulted deer. Flashbeer made me laugh - a lot.

But I just don't get this new one. All it does is creep me out and remind me why it is never a good idea to plant your hair in the ground and then water it with beer.

PS. If you have a sense of humour then check this ad out. If you are easily offended then please keep the queue moving... nothing more to see here!

As of 3:03 PM Yesterday...

I've been alive:

915,148,800 seconds
15,252,480 minutes
254,208 hours
10,592 days
1513 weeks
29 years

Mission Moment #7 (in anticipation)

Getting to bed tonight before 1am, and not having to get up at 6.15am tomorrow morning.

Mission Moment #6

Spending 5 hours (very late at night!) collaborating on a 5 minute talk. Spending a good portion of that time in gales of laughter.

Mission Moment #5

Learning the 'Dzzzzzzzzz' game. I still haven't won even though I've now played it about 40 times.

Mission Moment #3

Standing in the playground talking with a casual teacher for an hour and a half about who God is and what he has done for us in Jesus, and then hearing the words 'Can we please meet up again so we can keep talking about this?'